To the best co-worker I've ever known... the co-pilot of my car... the first mate of my kayak... my hiking partner... the engine to my roller-blades... and my inspiration to get off the sofa and go play in the snow...

You will be missed my friend...

He was the smartest being that I've ever met (far smarter than me).

He would unlock a dead-bolted door, just so he could greet me in the front yard when I came home. He'd even unlock the bedroom window so he could go out onto the porch roof and get a better view of when I was driving back down our street.

I taught him not to bark when he was a puppy, but soon realized that I couldn't figure out what he wanted when he came up to me with that goofy grin and wagging that tail... so I taught him sign language... left swipe of the paw meant "I gotta go pee now!" and right swipe meant "Feed me now!"

Hmm... Can I teach him words too? That would be funny!   I started to hold back his bowl before I fed him and said "Food", and "Water" before I laid down his water bowl. He quickly caught on and soon was coming up to me saying "Woood" and "Wadaah"!

There's so much more that I could go into but I won't drone on... there's really no need to, because as smart as he was, his best attribute is that he was a dog...
He always was happy to see me...
He always knew when I was having a bad day and forced me to laugh through the tears...
And he always forced me to go out and enjoy the real world instead of vedging out on my sofa...

A puppy at heart until the end, he seemed OK until last Saturday, when he a hard time going upstairs... then on Sunday, he needed a boost to stand up. On Monday, when I went to take him to the vet, I lifted him up and he had nothing left... he couldn't even stand up.

I carried him to the car and took him to the vet. She said that it seems he has severe hip dysplasia and had very little cartilage and muscles left in his hind section and that he would probably never walk again. She then said that he was too far gone to even operate on.

As he sat in my lap, he began to shake... looking between me and the vet. He somehow knew what we were talking about... It's like he was afraid to die. I was having a hard time holding it together and asked if I could use the bathroom, as I didn't want to loose it in front of him. I was so numb it was hard to walk... Covered in his pee and fighting back tears I made my way to the bathroom.

After several minutes of crying, I made my way back to the examination room and talked further with the vet. She told me to take my time before making the decision... so I again excused myself and went outside to clear my head. I began to think about what the vet said about him being too far gone, but could not understand how "terminal dysplasia" could go unnoticed by both myself and the vet until the last 3 days of his life. I began to piece together all of the other signs/symptoms that have transpired over the past couple of years and realized that he obviously has something else major going on for a long time... another underlying issue that both myself and the vet somehow never pieced together. Either way, he was inoperable, so I went back in sign the papers for "compassionate" termination of his life... I knew it was for the best, best it's the worst mind-fuck to make a conscious decision to kill anything... especially the being that has always been there for me for the past 13 years.

So on August 13th, one day before his 13th birthday, my friend quickly passed away in my arms.

You never realize how much a pet is a part of your life until they are gone (especially when you live alone). It's been 6 days since and I still look down every time I get off the sofa to make sure that I'm not going to step on him... I still check the water bowl every time I go into the kitchen... I still keep thinking that I have to get up to let him out... but the worst reality is when I come home to an empty house... and then when I go to bed, expecting his to hop up with me until I go to sleep (something I now find very hard to do)...

I was surprised to get a card from my vet a few days ago. I opened it to find a nice personal message inside along with a sympathy card which made my heart a little lighter. It read:

"By the edge of the wood, at the foot of the hill,
in a lush, green meadow where time stands still...
Where the friends of man and women do run,
when their time on Earth is over and done...
For there between this world and the next,
is a place where each beloved creature finds rest.

On this golden land, they wait and they play,
for the rainbow bridge they cross over one day.
No more do they suffer, in pain or in sadness,
for here they are whole, their lives filled with gladness.
Their limbs are restored, their health renewed,
their bodies have healed, with strength imbued.

They romp through the grass, without even a care,
until one day they start, and sniff the air.
All ears prick forward, eyes dart front and back,
they all of a sudden, one breaks from the pack.
For just at that instant, their eyes have met;
Together again, both person and pet.

So they run to each other, these friends from long past,
the time of their parting is over at last.
The sadness they felt while they were apart,
has turned to joy once more in each heart.
They embrace with a love that will last forever,
and then... side by side... they cross over... together."

#dog #pets #MansBestFreind

Transgender Transition - Work Harassment Continues

I should have gone to a lawyer... but I didn't. I even had a fellow employee (who doesn't even know that I'm transgender) say that I should go to one because I have a MAJOR harassment claim... but foolishly, that's not what I'm about...

For a person that has a high IQ, I'm SO stupid sometimes... I should have taken their advice!

About 3 weeks ago, another employee (who I overheard "Gay mocking me" with other employees) purposely went out of his way again to make my nightly tasks harder on me. When I tried to reason with him (several times, even adding "Can you please" several times into the request), he turned around and HE ACTUALLY HIT ME!

What the fuck???

If I was outside of work, I would have decked him, but as I can't afford to loose my job, I re-approached him and said that's not cool and I could report that to the manager. He turned around, gave me the finger and said, "Fuck you".

My company's policy, as I was previously told by my manager is "Anyone who is involved in a fight, even if it's in self-defense, is fired". As I knew that this would obviously escalate, I did report it to my manager. Not to get anyone fired... just to stop the bullshit before it got worse.

They pulled the video, which backs my report... but today, I got pulled into the office and written-up for "unproductive behavior as witnessed on the video"... WTF you say? Yes I did too.

It was explained to me that I should have let him shit on me without complaining or confronting him and reported it immediately to my manager prior to letting it escalate to the point where he felt he had to hit me. WTF???

I calmly stated the irony about how, if I did it his way instead of  the way I was calmly handling it, I would have wasted a half an hour... and that REALLY would have been unproductive behavior.

He again said that I was wrong for "letting it escalate"... and then went on to say that he didn't understand my previous claim of being harassed either.

So apparently, he doesn't see that being constantly called faggot and constantly being denied the use of machinery that I need to do my job as harassment... and I'm not supposed attempt to reason with any homo-phoebes that harass me, I should report EVERYTHING directly to a manager instead, which will waste multiple work hours (mine, the manager's and the employee that I'm supposed to rat on)... and will only lead (as I found out the hard way) to more harassment and retribution. I guess he's had a pretty sheltered life...

But it's obvious to me (from the wording in the write-up) that they are trying to document "just cause" for terminating me... the one that's being harassed...

In the weeks since the previous incident, I've been researching other "transgender-friendly companies" and employee complaints and I've been finding similar posts.

All I ask is that I can go to work, put in a hard days work, pay my bills, and not be harassed. Is that too much to ask???

I can't remember the last time I actually got a good night's sleep without  waking up an hour after I go to bed, pissed of about something that was done or said to me at work.... Oh yes I can... it was before I started working there...

I should look for another job but seriously... What if it turns out to be even worse than this?

The moral of the story is:  Even though a company may say they are "transgender-friendly" and have strict "non-harassment policies", if the employees and managers are clueless and homo-phoebes, you still run the risk of being put through hell for just showing up for work and trying to put in a good days work.

We need to stand up and speak out. Many of these companies that claim to be "transgender-friendly" think that by seeming "liberal" they will convince prospective employees to accept a job offer for far below market rate. A few even may do it for the right reasons but don't have any localized complaints process. Whatever the case may be, do you research and research complaints as well.

If you are already working for a company that prefers to ignore harassment and punishes the harassed, thus making your life a living hell, let the corporate offices know that what they printed on paper is NOT what is being followed.

#transgender #employment #workissues  #harassment #discrimination #employment #transgender-friendly